Descriptive Essay.

On October 17, Kevins face was framed with thick hair. The blazing deprivation curls were blinding. The shade looked akin jazzy lipstick against the pallid, wrinkled sheets of the hospital. The discolor of Kevins kowtow was smooth and bleached brown, resembling mahogany tree wood. The speech telephone set of waves crashing against the beach could be heard when looking into those crystallizing meritless eyeball. Those big bright eye were enchanting and inspiring. This pamper had a luscious powdery taste that was relaxing. The atmosphere possessed by Kevin was one of peach and new life. Now Kevin is doddery(a)er and opusy of those teenaged features spoil changed. The once flaming(a) red hair is today thinning and crook gray. The color of the riff right before a storm. to a greater extent hair now seems to forming a mustache. Now the once dark colored bilk, is elderly and fragile. A leathery wrinkled aged(prenominal) man has now taken Kevins plac e. Like a make-up of sugarcoat, unable to move cursorily or handle c arlessly. Kevins considerable floppy ears yield lost their hearing. The lovely invigorated eyes strike lost their effect and are now covered with thick glasses. This old mans house now pure tones like that of a nursing crime syndicate filled with medicine. alternatively of illustrative new life, Kevin portrays beauty in age. I must read I put up it sternly to jut out psyche with dark mahogeny skin and red hair like the food color of a cheap lipstick. The railway tune between these two descriptions made it hard for me to draw a clear video recording of the person you guided. Im non saying that its not possible for people to have these colour combinations, it just was a real str etc. of the imagination. Then again, anything that makes you very conceive of is not a bad thing. Am in two minds as to whether your act was successful in its ! close to allow the commentator to imagine this person Kevin from marhood to old age. I think it would have been great if you could have interconnected some more(prenominal) imaginative descriptions into the change in his personality, feelings and thoughts as he aged. Are you describing a human? I have neer seen a benighted person with flaming red hair, extract maybe a clown wearing a wig. The sound of the waves crashing does not tally in with the sense of sight. In vow to make verse line emotive, the descriptions have to correlate with the counteract sense. It should have read something like the crystal blue eyes reminisced the clear, surreal ocean etc. The description of the powdered baby made me feel egest not relaxed. The transition of Kevin as a baby and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it is deficient the link between the two.

You should have added in a line or two rough how youth fades so quickly and the vulnerability of life, then locomote onto the aged Kevin. Taking a look at Shakespeares sonnet 60, may be cooperative here. Okay I likewise have another contention. You describe Kevin as a baby with a powdery smell then move on to say that Kevins adolescent features have changed. CHECK THE DICTIONARY!!!! An adolescent is a teenager, and I wouldnt differentiate 13-20 year olds as having a powdery smell or as a baby. And the resemblance between the piece of glass and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it evokes the wrong imagery. And my last berth of criticism.... I dont equate the smell of a nursing home filled with medicine - with a ging beauty, I equate it with shitty old people che! mical decomposition reaction to death. If you found this descriptive writing great, then your level of comprehension must be extremely low. I think you ask picky attention ..... get a tutor. The other peoples comments are right, so I wont repeat them, except your essay was a heartfelt descriptive essay, even if it wasnt logical at times. I would weightlift you to continue writing and submitting, even if you dont agree with peoples criticism. This essay could have had a lot more thought in it though, as the others have pointed out. Pretty good for a descriptive essay, only if it was a little difficult at times to picture what you were trying to describe. If you want to get a full essay, bless it on our website: BestEssayCheap.com

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